Pregnancy Updates

Well, here I am in my 31st week of pregnancy. Almost 8 months pregnant and feeling completely miserable :( Since my last "whoa is me" post, my body has continued to fall apart. One good news is that my OBGYN decided to give me a prescription for the wonderful "morning sickness" nausea that decided that return to my life in the middle of the night. Not only was I not sleeping well at night due to my aching back, but being up all night with nausea was just too much. I could barely function at work or at home due to extreme sleep deprivation and just feeling like CRAP. I was nervous about taking medication while pregnant, but confirmed with about three doctors that the prescription is safe and to take it. Since I've been taking it before bed at night, I've been feeling better and a little bit more rested. The aching back is still very present though along with now aching groin muscles that make it uncomfortable to walk. I'm guessing that's coming from all the stretching going on with my ligaments in the area. This past week or so, Jack has really decided to show the world where he's currently living. Several coworkers, family members....hell everyone....has commented on how I've really "popped out"..."like a watermelon under my shirt". Lovely. Jack has also starting tap dancing on my bladder, which is always an uncomfortable feeling. ANNNNDDD Braxton Hicks contractions...wow, you suck! Well, if this means I'm almost to the end, I'll take it! I'm hoping with all the holiday festivities coming up that time will pass quickly and before we know it, Jack will be here!

On a happier note, Halloween is tomorrow and my big boy Max will be debuting as Buzz Light Year! I think I'm more excited than he is to see him in his costume and take pictures :) Other big news in our house: Toy Story 3 comes out on Tuesday - woohoo! Mommy and daddy are definitely excited for that one as well, since it means we'll get to watch something other than the Toy Story 1 & 2 that's been playing at our house for 2 months straight.

I hope everyone has a Happy Halloween and is gearing up for the Holidays! I know it's going to get crazy around here with all the different family get togethers we're having while preparing for Jack....but hey, as I said, it'll make time fly hopefully!

Yuck.

I'm just going to be blunt and say it, I'm not shamed. I Hate Being Pregnant. I hated being pregnant the first time around. But I'm REALLY hating being pregnant this time around. Last time with Max, yeah, it sucked, but I also was not working full time and was not attempting to chase a two year old around. This time I am busy, exhausted and just in pain. You forget about how much something sucks after while....that was me with pregnancy. I forgot about how much it sucks until all those wonder things that come along with pregnancy started in.

For the record, I know I sound like a negative debbie downer. I know being pregnant is a miracle and yada, yada yada. But homegirl is tired. Hurting. Ready to be done. Just appease a very pregnant girl and don't judge. I'm gonna rant - thanks.

First of all, I am SO OVER being fat. Yes, I know, some of you who have seen me are probably saying "you're not even that big!". I'm aware that compared to other ladies who are 7 1/2 months pregnant, I may not look that far along. I assure you, though, that I feel like a whale for my own body. I am a person who is typically very health conscious and likes to maintain a fit physique. When I have no control over the size of my body, it frustrates me and makes me very upset :( I also hate the fact that my body retains water like whoa and the number on the scale and I are not seeing eye to eye right now. All of those clothes in my closet I currently can't wear aren't helping matters any. Rotating the same four pairs of pants and six shirts gets old after awhile (I refuse to spend a crapload of money on maternity clothes - they're hideous and temporary). I currently have 10 more weeks to go until my due date....then typically 6 weeks to wait until you can "officially" exercise....but you better believe I'll be taking baby steps to get my old body back the day after delivery, because this crap is unacceptable.

My back is about to break in two. I was sent to a physical therapist early on in my pregnancy due to increased back pain. The therapist told me that one of my hips was currently lower than the other, causing extreme discomfort. Unfortunately, pregnancy is only making it worse....and even after the pregnancy, all you can do is exercise and strengthen your core (although you won't have all the added pressure of pregnancy on your body). My back is getting so bad I can barely sleep at night for lack of a comfortable position. Mark tells me that I put up a "wall" at night since I have a huge body pillow and about five other pillows surrounding me trying to find some comfort. It's extremely irritating and just downright painful. I've stopped going to physical therapy because the exercises they made me do was honestly only adding to my pain, and seriously, who needs that while pregnant?!

I am tired. Sluggish. Moody. Hungry. Disgusted. Hurting. BLAH! I know all you ladies out there that either have been pregnant or are pregnant can sympathize with me to some degree. 10 more weeks....seems like an eternity!

Pregnancy Depression

I've hit the point in my pregnancy where I am just BLAH. My back is killing me. I can't sleep at night for lack of a comfortable position. I feel like a fat ass. My hormones are out of control. Jack enjoys kicking right on my bladder all day long. I'm working full-time. Max is two (well, almost!)...enough said. THIS MOMMA HAS HAD IT! I am in desperate need of some quality "me" time. The problem is, the "me" time I enjoy most is primping....and right now, I don't feel that all the primping in the world could make me feel better about myself. When you look like you're hoarding a basketball under your shirt, the last thing you feel is attractive. Still....I've tried telling myself I can still accessorize myself with cute necklaces, earrings, etc. I can still get my hair did. I still need to look presentable, even if I feel like CRAP. Lately, I've had this major urge to just want to be back in my old workout routine and skinny again! Oh how I long for those adorable jeans in my closet just waiting to be worn. I'm so ready to be back in shape and feeling good about myself again....maybe getting my back strength back up so it doesn't hurt so bad all the time. *Sigh* But for right now, I have another long 12 weeks to go. Then, I have roughly 6 weeks after that until I'm technically suppose to be able to work out again. Luckily, I haven't been gaining as much weight as I did with Max, so hopefully it's even easier to take the weight off. My unrealistic-yet-I'm-still-going-to-try goal is to be back into my old clothes by Spring Break....that's roughly 3 months after Jack will be born. We'll see how that one goes. I'm a very dedicated dieter when I want to be, and we have the Insanity workout DVDs here that I'm ready to literally sweat my butt off to.

Well, this blog makes me sound like a serious Debbie Downer. Don't get me wrong....I know I'm getting an amazing gift from this pregnancy. I know I'm lucky that be able to be pregnant and have my beautiful baby boys. Some days, though, you just have to vent. Today is one of those days. Now I'm off to eat some pumpkin pie....hey, pumpkin isn't that bad for you and I deserve it after I took a "brisk" two mile walk! :)

Quick Update

I have a few spare minutes in my day where I thought, "I'll blog!". Since I'm at the mercy of Max waking up from his nap at any moment, this will be a brief, bulleted blog of simple updates in our life. Here goes.

• Still really enjoying my teaching position this year - yay! Some days are long and stressful, but I'm able to walk out of school at the end of the day with a smile on my face and head home to my family with a clear head, so I'm okay with that!


• Baby Jack is growing and Mommy Brittany is getting bigger. I'm starting to feel Jack almost all the time now....he's not too shy about making his presence known. In the past few days, my students have commented me to that "I'm getting bigger". I told them I was okay with that, as long as they told me I was "getting smaller" after Jack was born :) I'm still not too big...people find it amazing that I'm almost 7 months pregnant, thinking I look only 4 or 5 months along. Hopefully that means I haven't gained too much weight either (I haven't been brave enough to check that one out in awhile!).....uggh, I hate scales. Speaking of which, my apetite has been out of control lately....not a good sign for my scale, either. Otherwise, mama and baby are doing well. I go for my glucola test on Wednesday....hopefully we'll get an a-okay on that! After this appointment on Wednesday, I'll be in my third trimester and hitting up the doctor's office every two weeks now....like I have the time for that! But, it means we're getting closer :)


• Max is GROWING UP! His language skills have really taken off since he started to go to daycare two days a week....it's amazing and so worth the money (or so I tell myself when I write that check out weekly...haha, I kid I kid!). He says SO many new words now, and even picks up phrases that we say by just repeating them after we say them. The difference in a month's time is truly amazing. It's like he's a little boy now. This also means we really need to watch our language around the big boy :) I can't believe he's going to be TWO on the 21st....where did time go?! We're currently planning his birthday party right now....Halloween themed, of course :) He's deciding whether he wants to be a dinosaur or Buzz Lightyear for Halloween. Max has become OBSESSED with Toy Story....all he wants to do is watch Toy Story 1 or 2 all day long. He loves Buzz. He has a Toy Story bookbag for daycare, all the Toy Story stuffed animals, tons of Toy Story books, Buzz Lightyear snow boots for Winter, both movies...the third movie already on reserve, Toy Story jammies....he's all decked out. Max has been quite the trooper lately as we head into his "sick" season....he's already had croup (made even worse with his lovely asthma thrown in there) and a double ear infection all within one month....both of which he took like a champ.

Well, Max has woken up from his nap and we're off to eat a snack!

It's your burfday

That's right people, today I turn the big 2-5. This is an age I've been dreading...since I feel as though it's somewhat of the first "milestone age" of getting old. After 21, the birthdays just seem to be less exciting and more like, "Crap! I'm getting up there!". To me, 25 is...well...it's basically exiting from your young twenties and graduating into the "half century old or older" club. Half way to 50...whaaaat?! I guess I'm exaggerating a little bit...I didn't wake up in tears today or drudge around the house feeling sorry for myself :) So far, Mark and Max allowed me to sleep in...take a shower when they left for a little bit...finish up some laundry....and now write this fine blog here. We'll be going over to my parents for a homemade breakfast, then maybe a little shopping or a movie with my mama....then out to dinner at Ruth Chris Steak House with Austin and Tabitha. We always talk about going there and have never followed through, so I'm super excited...I've heard the food is fabulous, and let's face it, there isn't much food my pregnant butt doesn't like these days! So, today is like any other day....I'm just getting a little extra attention I guess :) Oh, and maybe my car insurance will drop as well...bonus!

In other news, school is still going great. Everything is still falling into place, and I enjoy planning for class and actually going to work in the morning. I'm in a good place right now :)

Last week was quite the stressful week for me...I'm hoping for quite the turnaround this week. When we went in for another doctor appointment as well as another ultrasound, baby Jack still wouldn't fully cooperate with the tech, so now we are going back on Tuesday for another ultrasound. Doctor has stated there is no cause for concern, they just simply cannot check the last check mark off their ultrasound list until they have clear shots. Of course to me, all I'm hearing is, "SOMETHING'S WRONG! SOMETHING'S WRONG! SOMETHING'S WRONG!". So, in true Brittany fashion, I spent the past few says freaking out to family members and calling the doctor for reassurance as to why we are getting another ultrasound. By now, I'm sure many think I'm certified crazy. I can't help it though....I read into things way too much, just the way I am. SO, I'm really hoping that on Tuesday Jack decides to be in a position to give the tech every shot they need so the doctor can tell me "A-OK!" and we can move on from this ultrasound drama we've been put through this pregnancy. I'd be okay with having no more ultrasounds with this pregnancy...it's been so stressful! With Max, we had one ultrasound early on to determine a due date...then one at about 20 weeks for the usual scan. With Jack, we've had two early ultrasounds to determine the due date....and we're going on our third ultrasound for the usual scan to check the baby out. I'm all ultrasound-ed out. Also this week, as soon as we returned home from our ultrasound (me basically in tears over frustration and craziness), Max was lying on the couch obviously sick :( So, I had to stop thinking about my poor self and switch it into overdrive in mommy gear. Turns out Max had croup, which only made his asthma act up worse. The two together are not a friendly combination. I was up basically every night this week with him while still going to work. There were a few times the coughing and labored breathing got so severe, we almost took him to the ER. After a few scares, we had the bags packed and ready to go by the door. I felt terrible for my miserable baby, and there was nothing I could do but hold him. After several medications and a few crazy days, Max is feeling better. He still has a cough, but he's up and running again. It made for a very stressful and long week, on top of my own self already freaking out.

SO...the goal for this week is to have a healthy Max back on his regular schedule and returning to daycare....a CLEAR, BEAUTIFUL ultrasound on Tuesday....and a successful and calm week at work with the kiddos. Fingers crossed :)

Karma?

Well, I made it through the first week of school! Technically, I made it through the first three days of school since the students didn't come back until Wednesday.....but us teachers were there Monday and Tuesday slaving away in our classrooms and attending countless meetings. So, it was a full week back to work for me. First off, Max did fabulous getting up early to go to daycare on Wednesday and Friday...AND did a fabulous job with his teacher and new friends there. Thanks Max for being such an awesome little dude! :) Now for even more exciting news...

I know it's still pretty early on in the school year, but I am really digging where I'm at and what I'm doing this year. The students, though challenging, really need a positive role model...and really do seem to want to learn underneath a lot of underlying issues they are having in life. The teachers are so down to earth and welcoming...real people! The staff is so helpful and funny. And the administration....WOW! They have been so supportive and real, it's amazing. I have never felt like I had a team on my side until now. Not only have they supported my classroom decisions regarding discipline and my students since day one, but they have shown that to the students by following through on their zero tolerance policy for behavior. WHAAAT?! You mean, you actually care about me and my classroom?! You mean, you want me to be able to create an environment in which learning is possible....yet the classroom is structured with strict procedures and consequences?! It's amazing. I went home from school the first three days with a huge smile on my face, anxious to go back the next day and continue to make a difference for my kids who truly need it! *For those of you that are wondering what in the world I'm talking about regarding discipline and all that in my classroom, I teach students with emotional disabilities and some severe behavioral issues.* OH, and did I mention the big ol' security guards and school police officers and patrol up and down the hallways...popping their heads into my room to let the kids know they're there...as well as to see if I need anything?! LOVE IT! I also must mention the fact that there is another teacher in my building that teaches the same group of studentsd I do, only in a different grade level. He, too, has been an amazing help and support to me. I feel truly blessed and thankful for this opportunity I have been given this year. I feel as though my teaching experience has been totally flipped around, and I have that "spark" to want to teach again...something that was fizzling out due to previous circumstances. I'm so excited to get that spark back and be excited for each day. I'm so excited to get through the rough exteriors of my students and actually help them in their lives. I'm so excited to be a a part of the community I've been welcomed into. I know I'll have some rough days. I know everyone won't always agree. But for right now, I'm so thankful, thrilled and happy. Although I do still miss being at home with Max everyday, I know I'm doing what's best for my family, myself and really these kids in the community. Who knows, maybe my perspective will change in two days, but for right now I'm hopeful and open for change. Karma has swung in my direction :)

Oh boy!

It's a BOY! This holiday season, we will welcome Jackson Anthony to our family. We plan to call him Jack, so we will have our rough and tough Max and Jack. I felt kind of bad when a lot of people thought I was angry or disappointed when it didn't turn out to be a girl. Of course I'm not - Jack is healthy and that's all that matters! Would I like a girl someday? Heck yeah! But I'm excited for Max to have a little brother close in age that he can play with and they can grow up being best buddies. I also have an excuse for all the clothes I buy Max now since Jack will be able to wear them as well :) In the future (distant future, folks!), we may have another one...and maybe that will be a girl....but if not, we will be a chaotic family of three boys haha. Anyway, I am VERY excited to welcome Jack and even more excited to get back and shape and fit into my clothes! I tell you what....I don't like one thing about pregnancy, and I am over having a very limited wardrobe and feeling fat. I still have a little over four months to go, so I guess I'll just need to keep on truckin.

One small hitch in the pregnancy that we currently have to keep our eyes on is that apparently my placenta is lying pretty low in the uterus. For those of you who may not know, the placenta is what provides the baby with nutrients through the umbilical cord. It usually lays up high, so that when it's time for the baby to be born, there is nothing blocking the baby's exit. Well, when your placenta lays low, it could block the baby's exit and also cause some damage to mama. The ultrasound revealed that right now, it's not completely covering the exit for the baby, but it is low enough that we have to keep an eye on it. When I go for my next check up in 4 weeks they will do another ultrasound to see the placenta's position. I guess this is something that sometimes just corrects itself and it migrates back up north. Otherwise, if it continues to stay low, that could mean a possible c-section. If it stays low, it COULD cause some problems toward the end of the pregnancy as well....so I'm really hoping that it migrates back up north so we have no worries of any minor complications and so I don't have to have a planned c-section. We'll see what happens!

School starts in one freaking week for my corporation and I am NOT prepared. We have been so busy since I've accepted this teaching position that I really haven't had much time to prepare. This week, though, I'll be in my classroom for most of the week getting myself organized and ready to go. Max also starts daycare on Wednesday (he'll go Wednesdays and Fridays) and I'm freaking myself out about it...he;s getting so big!

Well, adios for now, I will update soon with the happenings of our fam.